From the mouths of babes and motorists! The following statements, given by motorists, were taken at accident scenes, This collection was first published by Forbes Magazine.
"The guy was all over the road, I had to swerve a number of times before I hit him," (That taught him a lesson.)
I saw a slow moving, sad-faced old gentlemen, as he bounced off the roof of my car, (His motorcycle bounced off shortly afterward.)
I pulled away from the side of the road, glanced at my mother-in-law and headed over the embankment. (Wonder what he would have done had he glanced at his ex-wife.)
I had been driving for 40 years when I fell asleep at the wheel and had an accident, (Some kind of record, Most folks can’t drive for more than a day or so without falling asleep,)
The telephone pole was approaching. I was attempting to swerve out of its way when it struck the front end. (This is possible. Radar experts have found instances of telephone poles, houses and even mountains that have been clocked when travelling at speeds in excess of 55 mph.)
I was sure the old fellow would never have make it to the other side of the road when I struck him, (Some of the other old fellows did make it to the other side.)
In my attempt to kill a fly, I drove into a telephone pole, (Next time I’ll kill him against the side of a house.)
The pedestrian had no idea which direction to run, so I ran over him, (This is a game we often play here in Forest Hills.)
I told the police I was not injured, but on removing my hat, found that I had fractured my skull, (Some tough hat, If only he had worn a helmet.)
There you have it, Most motorists drive as if they are on drugs or shine, One in five has an accident each year, You may be his accident. Drive as if you are the only sane person on the road.
